Girlfriend.........maybe

So first off I havent been on here in a realy long time. I resontly met a girl that i kinda work with. I say kinda because I deliver beer and she works at one of my stops. I asked her out one day and she said yes. This was on a thursday. We made plans to hang out on saturday. She text me on friday to see if I wanted to go to a bbq at her place. I went and thats where things began. I made a move and things went from there. We have spent every day together exept maybe three days. Its been um think we are starting our 6th week. The sex is amazing. Out of this world kind of sex. Best Ive ever had and she says the same thing. She has said from the begining that she doesnt like doing the relastionship thing. Shes not good at it. I think I pushed a relationship status on us. So now theres a little resentment on her part....maybe. Idk. she is so hard to read. She said the other day that she would need an open relationship. In the past I have always wanted that. But for me its after ayear or two of being with the person before I thought that. Now that I found someone that is into that. My minds fucking with me. It says yes we found the one thats on the same page as you. But every time I think of her with someone else my stumic gets in knotts. I am always thinking of her and cant wait to see her again. Even if its just for a moment. The smile she gives me and the looks...melt me away. So we had a threesome the other day. It was me and her and a guy. It was alot of fun. But my heart or mind is messing with me. Its saying it shouldnt be this way...why are u ok with it like this? I cant decide if i Love her or im in lust with her. I think I need some time apart from her. The problem is that the sex...I love it and cant seem to get enought of it. All in all im so fucked. She also said that she doesnt want to hurt me so we should end things. Shes said this almost from day one. I talked her into staying with me and we are going from there. I just dont know what to do. I want what she wants but I dont at the same time. Is it because this is still all new to both us and I dont want to share her yet...or ever. Idk. I truely wish i knew. Things would be so much easier. Well theres my rant for the year.